Nectar of the Fire Gods

Now my Uncle Mike is a great guy for many reasons. He is an awesome waterskiier. He fosters informality and rampant cussing at family gatherings. He's the blond, spiky surfer, the baby of the family, and always will be. But I must say that the current laurel that crowns his beloved brow is the salsa.

Ah yes. Uncle Mikey's salsa. He brought a gallon tub of it to Thanksgiving. I don't know how it survived the night to end up leftover in my fridge. (Perhaps it helped that The Boyfriend and I sneaked it out early. HA!) What I am curious about now, however, is the alarming rate at which this gallon tub of habanero and garlic goodness is disappearing. Oh, and the inversely small rate at which all other food in the house is following suit.

Yes, Honey. I know you can hear me. I know that you have been eating it for snacks, lunch and dinner. Though the garlic and vegetables are good for you, I don't think that mountains of chips are. Oh, and speaking of things that aren't good for you, there's always--#1: not eating much of a lovingly prepared dinner due to pre-meal salsa-ing and #2: eating all of this gnome's salsa behind her back!! Just because you are home more doesn't mean you get to eat me out of house and home. Nuh uh.

I'm sure you remember when you found my hidden stash of chocolate chips and said, hmmm, these are hidden in plastic in the freezer behind the peas--they must be put there just for me! Unless we want a repetition of such hostilities, I do request that you cease and desist presently until a peace accord can be reached.